“We’ve always been friends (…) But we’re very close now,” ~ Rihanna on Chris Brown

I have a serious question. Why the hell do celebrities lie about their relationships? We all know they’re fucking, so what is the point of denying it?

Chris Brown and Forhedda were spotted all hugged and kissed up (which they could have done at the hotel or in the car if they are trying to hide it…lightbulb) at a Miami KFC after the Glow in the Dark show Tuesday night. Talk about an obvious ploy! Ya’ll take that shit somewhere.

Now if you are going to jack one’s wig game the least you could do is pull it off the right way. I mean, really!

I suppose this is a promotional photo for Ashanti’s “upcoming” album. Seeing as how I am not a fan of hers, I am definitely failing to understand her new attitude (can’t say I give a damn either). She is giving me some kind of Pulp Fiction/Vampire in Brooklyn feel here…like she bit Nelly’s penis off and keeps it in that cup.

[ spotted at ThatGrapeJuice // shouts to Ed the World Famous ]

Check out Forhedda leaving KFC (it figures) draped up like a tart version of one of The Lost Boys. Is that a Dereon bow?

I love how homegirl with the autumn sunrise hairdo talked Rih-Rih into adding her to the entourage — trying to be famous by association. Get on the Greyhound and take your clown-head ass home, girl!

[ photo spotted @ Necole Bitchie ]

Is Da Brat out of the closet now? She looks to be going for a new lesbe-rific look that only she can pull off — call it butch chic! I’m just wondering how deep she had to journey into the wig crypt to find that sea urchin sitting atop her scalp.

Honestly speaking, I love Brat. Nobody has swag like her. I bet she walked into that event gripping every coochie in sight, with no apologies. Only because she’s a bad chick like that.

If you will, take a look at producer Jazze Pha in the premiere episode of his online cooking show with Super Deluxe. Here he is joined by Emmanuel Lewis (I have no clue) as they team up to prepare a “pork chop pizza”! All I can say is that I never want to attend a family barbecue held by one of these Negroes.

Jesus be a bottle of Tums.

I think it is safe to say that Lil’ Mama has a style all her own…a style I shall neither understand nor shall I enable. My little rap friend just doesn’t seem to give a damn sometimes, as you can plainly see. A grandma sweater, snow hat, and whatever is lying around in the cardboard boxes at the Goodwill — there you have her outfit.

I won’t give up on L’Mama, but it is hard to keep the faith when she is taking pictures looking like a little Russian lumberjack named Kasheef.

[ pics courtesy of Lil-MamaOnline ]

Looks like Cassie fully ignored my sound advice and decided to continue her “singing” career. Undermine my opinion if you want to, but you know I am right, girl. Anyway, the Bad Boy artist has a new track out called, “Thirsty”. The name serves perfectly, because homegirl was vocalizing like she had a case of dry mouth.

No word on whether or not this is the lead single of a new album, but you can check it out for yourself. Send Cassie a prayer, please.

Play: Cassie - Thirsty

See, this is what happens when you try to turn a video hoe into an actress — the heavens pour down devastation and terror on all of us. What the hell made anybody think that Angel Lola Luv (who I still think is a little off) could have a speaking role in a movie? I don’t wanna say model puss had anything to do with it, but judging by this trailer I found at RealTalkNY, I don’t understand how she made it past the cold reading.

Hell, I didn’t even think she could read!

I damn near jumped out of my skin when I came across this ad in my issue of this month’s VIBE. Yonnay is looking like someone blasted a full-force fart right in her eyes for this photo. Was it Hov? Did someone drop her Super Sweet Sixteen Dereon cake? What the hell is the mean mug for, lady?

Looks like Trina’s shooting a video for that new record of hers. It’s called “I Got A Thang For You” (ugh!) and features Meowth Keyshia Cole. Sad to say, I’m not feeling Trina like I used to. Oh well.

Keyshia looks like the cookie lady/girls basketball coach at my school for some odd reason. It’s funny because I don’t like that bitch either.

[ pic snatched from Oh Trina ]