MTV News caught up with Chris Brown and Rihanna at the Kids Choice Awards last week and grilled them about their relationship. Their response was of course, “We’re just friends” – whatever! I’m sure Rihanna drizzled her friendly Bajan fudge over Christopher’s yellow cake at some point, if you know what I mean. However, I’m tired of the bullshit, so I’m rolling with this claim.

Off-Topic: This child has on a custom Nickelodeon hoodie…rhinestones and all.

If you will, take a look at producer Jazze Pha in the premiere episode of his online cooking show with Super Deluxe. Here he is joined by Emmanuel Lewis (I have no clue) as they team up to prepare a “pork chop pizza”! All I can say is that I never want to attend a family barbecue held by one of these Negroes.

Jesus be a bottle of Tums.

Looks like Fat Joe hooked up with Mariah Carey’s Photoshop posse and created a very snaptastic mixtape cover dissing G-Unit — someone deserves a time out. Now, I don’t condone this foolishness for the simple fact that this Terror Squad/G-Unit feud is more tired than Superhead’s jawbone. However, those man breasts on Tony Yayo have stolen a piece of my soul.

At the same time, the whole “Hey, I don’t like you, so I’m going to call you gay” bid that these rappers steadily seem to whip out is not only redundant, but it is also pathetic and predictable. Does anyone even listen to these mixtapes?

I am indeed excited to hear the new N.E.R.D. album, but for now I am more interested in hearing what Pharrell was so worked up over. Is BAPE closing a store down? Maybe he saw Teyana Taylor’s video for the first time.

[ video snatched from kanYe’s Blog ]

So, not only is Katrina supposedly dissing Lil Wayne again (allow me to slit a wrist), but now she is taking shots at Khia in this little .gif file promoting her new album Still The Baddest. There’s nothing like a fresh dose of online gangsta to make the day go by smoother. Thanks for thinking of me, Trina.

I think it is safe to say that Lil’ Mama has a style all her own…a style I shall neither understand nor shall I enable. My little rap friend just doesn’t seem to give a damn sometimes, as you can plainly see. A grandma sweater, snow hat, and whatever is lying around in the cardboard boxes at the Goodwill — there you have her outfit.

I won’t give up on L’Mama, but it is hard to keep the faith when she is taking pictures looking like a little Russian lumberjack named Kasheef.

[ pics courtesy of Lil-MamaOnline ]

Kimora Lee Simmons filed for divorce from her estranged husband, Russell Simmons, in Los Angeles County Superior Court Tuesday.

The couple announced that they had split up in March 2006, but said they had already been separated “for some time.”

In court papers, Kimora, 32, cites irreconcilable differences and asks for legal and physical custody of the couple’s two daughters, Ming, 8, and Aoki, 5. She requests that Simmons, 50, get “reasonable child visitation … to be accompanied at all times by the children’s nanny and security personnel. [ source ]

I liked Russell and Kimora as a couple. They used to be so refreshing. Now Kimora is dating Give Us Us Free, and Russell is courting around that flexible little doll whose name doesn’t really matter. What happened to the real love? Ugh…Will and Jada are my last hope.

The new rap crew to keep your eyes on is Miami’s own Grind Mode. I did a spotlight on them not too long ago, remember? Anyway, I have been awaiting a video to their local smash single “I’m So High”, (I don’t know anything about “She So Fly”), and here it is. Pretty decent…nothing outrageous. Just fun effects and pretty girls — I’m not mad.

Can you South Dade jook?

Looks like Cassie fully ignored my sound advice and decided to continue her “singing” career. Undermine my opinion if you want to, but you know I am right, girl. Anyway, the Bad Boy artist has a new track out called, “Thirsty”. The name serves perfectly, because homegirl was vocalizing like she had a case of dry mouth.

No word on whether or not this is the lead single of a new album, but you can check it out for yourself. Send Cassie a prayer, please.

Play: Cassie - Thirsty