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Kid Fury July 3, 2006 Uncategorized No Comments

The Queen is finally free to rule her Hip-Hop kingdom once again. Kimberly “Lil’ Kim” Jones was released from the Federal Detention Center of Philadelphia this morning, where she was lovingly greeted by family, friends, and fans. She will be taken to her home in Alpine, NJ, where she must stay on a 32-day period of house arrest and can’t leave unless she has an extreme medical condition. I hope she doesn’t spend those 32 days eating, because it looks like she’s put on a couple pounds. Oh well, her plastic surgeon will take good care of that. Wait, is that an extreme medical condition? Yeah…it really is.

Another rapper free from the cage is DMX, who was released from prison in Weschester County, NY, after posting a $25,000 bail. He was locked up after missing two court dates to answer to charges of aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle and seat belt and unsafe lane change violations.

“Sometimes, they write me up, give me a ticket and I’m like, ‘Are you serious?’,” DMX told “You have to handcuff me just to give me a f**kin’ ticket? The same thing that makes you laugh, makes you cry. Sometimes I’m drunk doing 150 miles per hour and they let me go. [Police officer says,] ‘My kid loves you. Have a good night.’ Sometimes it’s ‘You’re DMX, please step out of the car [to be arrested].’”

I know, X. The law sucks doesn’t it. Ooh, speaking of which, I didn’t show up for jury duty today. Damn, jail is not for me.

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